The Shaman Documentary
by Efilnikufesin
Summary: What if a guy went around videotaping the shaman king characters and making a documentary? Please no flames! And please review! Disclaimer: I don't own Shaman King. But I do own Sho, and if you take him without asking first, you will die a horrible death
1. Chapter 1: Things are weird

The Shaman King Documentary

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: Okay Shaman King fans, My name's Sho Ryunosuke, and my name means Victory Dragon!

Anna: Who cares! Shut up and give me 100 pushups!

Sho: TT

Manta: Uh…Anna, aren't you being a little harsh?

Anna: SHUT UP SHORTY! 200 pushups!

Manta: TT

Yoh: Awww… Anna…

Anna: NO BACKSASS! 300 pushups!

Yoh: TT

And so it continues.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yoh's house

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Narrator: "So here we are, at the shaman onsen, here's the Shaman King himself at 7:00 AM, let's observe his behavior"

Yoh: drinking from the milk carton, looks down and sees Sho with the camera "Hey, what's up Sho?"

Narrator (Sho): "Shhhhh! I'm not here!"

Yoh: Looking confused "You're not?"

Sho: "No!"

Yoh: "Where are you then?"

Sho: "sigh Forget it, just ignore me for the time being, got it?"

Yoh: "Okay"

Sho: "Good"

Yoh: Continues drinking from the milk carton then reaches for the cereal "Mmmmmm…Lucky Charms…"puts some milk in mouth, then some cereal, and gargles it before swallowing.

Sho: "As you can see, the Shaman King has very strange eating habits."

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anna's room (Yes, Sho is insane)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: Sneaks into her room very carefully, so carefully in fact, that he only ran into one death-trap "hff..hff.." Arrives just in time to see Anna sleeping like a baby cuddling with a big, soft teddy bear (awww…so cute.), talking in her sleep "This is the forbidden room of Anna, the evil, sadistic fiancé to the Shaman King, notice how deep down, she's soft enough to cuddle with a teddy bear."

Anna: "Shut up Yoh! 2000 push-ups! You can't talk to me that way! Isn't that right teddy?"

Sho: Sweatdrops "Okay, soft enough to cuddle with a teddy bear is as far as she'll go."

Anna: "Make me breakfast Ryu! And you Sho, stop coming here early in the morning!"

Sho: "I better go before she wakes up" runs away, hitting another ten death-traps

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yoh: Hey Sho, if you ran into a bunch of death-traps, how come Anna didn't wake up?

Sho: Because I'm the author!

Anna: Walks up to Sho with an axe so big that it make's Astaroth's look like a rubber knife

Sho: "Uhhh…gotta go!" runs away with Anna close behind, screaming can be heard in the distance

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You like reviewing, you love it, you can't live without it!


	2. Chapter 2: Things get strange

The Shaman King Documentary chapter 2!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: "Hello fans, I'm Sho Ryunosuke, and my name means Victory Dragon!

Anna: "Shut up! You said that last time! You shall pay for your repetitiveness!"

Just before she could say "1000 push ups", a sound-proof prison falls from the air and incases Anna.

Sho: "I love being the author!"

King of Fanfics: "Sho Ryunosuke!"

Sho: "Yes?"

King of Fanfics: "You have been abusing your author abilities!"

Sho: "I have?"

King of Fanfics: "I hereby relieve you of your powers!"

Sho: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

Anna: Free of prison "I was just going to give you 1000 push ups, but because of what you just did…1,000,000 push ups!"

Sho: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Outside Ryu's room

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: "Okay, now that my moment of complete and utter terror is over…" Weird narrator voice "Let's now see the eldest and weirdest" Sneaks into Ryu's room with a paper bag over his head so Ryu doesn't notice him. "Watch how he is easily fooled into thinking no one's here!"

Ryu: Admiring himself in the mirror "You're a lady killer ain't ya? I bet you could get a date with any woman you want! The only reason they don't go out with you is because they're playing hard to get!"

Sho: Sweatdrops

Ryu: Admiring his clothes "And with a wardrobe like this, what girl wouldn't kiss me?"

Sho: "Notice how the subject kids himself into thinking that disco is still cool…" Paper bag falls off head

Ryu: Sees Sho "Hey! What are you doing here!?!"

Sho: "Uuuhhh…I'm…not here?"

Ryu: "Oh…" Returns to admiring himself

Sho: "The idiotic are easily fooled" leaves room

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Outside Pirka's room

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: "heh heh Time for the XXX part of the documentary!" Opens door to find Pirka just finished getting dressed "DARN! SO CLOSE!"

Pirka: "Huh!?! Who's there!?!"

Sho: "Uh oh, I've been spotted!" Runs

Pirka: Grabs back of shirt "Just what are you doing!?!"

Sho: "Uuuuhh…making a documentary about shamans…"

Pirka: "More like making a documentary about me without clothes!"

Sho: "Uuuuhh…w-where's your brother?"

Pirka: "Same place he's been since last night, the bathroom."

Sho: "Uuuuhh…gotta go!" Runs out of Pirka's room barely dodging the net.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Outside the bathroom

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: Knocks on door HOROHORO!

Horohoro: "ZzzzZzzz"

Sho: Opens door to find Horohoro sleeping on the toilet, he even has his pants on "Notice how the heavy eater sits on the toilet, even when he doesn't have to go…just incase."

Horohoro: Wakes up and sees Sho "Hey! A little privacy here!" Shuts door

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Time for reviewers appreciation.

Faust IX: Don't worry, Faust is coming soon.

Katoryu Diethel: What's XD?

THE PIT MONSTER: Thanks, I will!

Hyper-Shaman girl: It is weird, isn't it?

s91: Okay, I will!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

PLEASE REVIEW! I need info on chars that haven't appeared in the manga yet, please help!


	3. Chapter 3: Things get really strange

The Shaman Documentary Chapter 3

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: "mmf mmf" alas, Sho was brutally tied up and trapped in a net, courtesy of Pirka.

Pirka: "BRUTALLY!?! HE TRIED TO SEE ME NAKED!"

Anna: SHO! FOR BEING A PERV LIKE THAT…2,000,000 PUSH UPS!

Sho: TT "MMMF MMMF MMMF!"

Yoh: "How can he do 2,000,000 push ups, Anna? He's tied up!"

Anna: "What did I say in the first chapter Yoh!?! NO BACKSASS! 2,000,001 PUSH UPS!

Yoh: TT

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the Tao mansion

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sho: "Okay, here we are outside the door of Ren Tao, a paranoid, psychopathic shaman with a bad attitude, I am risking life and limb on this mission" Opens door and sneaks in to see Ren polishing his kwan dao.

Ren: "Polish on, polish off, polish on, polish off."

Sho: "So this is how Ren trains. Someone likes the karate kid movies" Moves closer

Ren: Picks up sharp, flaming knife and throws it at a dartboard covered with pictures of Horohoro, Yoh, Chocolove, Ryu, Faust, Lyserge, and Hao. The Knife hits Horohoro. "Perfect shot! That idiot shall have that happen in real life some day! And I shall be the one to do it to him! Mwahahahahaha!"

Sho: Sweatdrops "He is evil! Y'know, prier to most belief, he doesn't have an English accent."

Ren: "Huh? Who's there?"

Sho: "Uh oh…!"

Ren: "RYUNOSUKE! HOW DARE YOU INTRUDE ON ME IN MY ON ROOM! DIE!" Attacks Sho with his Kwan Dao.

Sho: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Runs out of his room and puts his back to the door. The kwan dao pierced the area of the door next to his armpit, just missing him. "Phew, that was close! Y'see what I mean when I say paranoid psycopath!?!"

Ren: Through door "I HEARD THAT!"

Sho: "RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Outside Jun's room

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: "hfff hfff hfff. Glad I got away from that guy." Walks up to Lee Bailong, who is guarding the door.

Lee Bailong: "Halt! Who goes there!"

Sho: "C'mon Bailong! It's me, Sho! Let me in!"

Lee Bailong: "What is your reason for wanting to see Miss Jun?"

Sho: "I'm making a documentary about us shamans."

Lee Bailong: "In that case…LEAVE!"

Sho: "If you don't let me through, I'll show Jun pictures of you and your wife!"

Lee Bailong: "THAT'S BLACKMAIL!"

Sho: "I know…"

Lee Bailong: "Uuuh…right this way…"

Sho: "Thanks Lee" Sneaks through door

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jun's room

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: "This is the chamber of Jun, the zombie summoning Dao si."

Jun: Eyes closed "Bailong? Is that you?"

Sho:…

Jun: "Bailong, could you get my weird leather hair strap thingy?"

Sho: Gets the thingy

Jun: "Thank you Bailong" sits up with her eyes still closed and ties up her hair.

Sho: "Pay close attention kids, this is how Jun does her hair."

Jun: "Hey! you're not Bailong!" Turns around and sees Sho with the camera "SHO! GET OUT OF MY ROOM!"

Sho: "Uuuh…gotta go!" Runs out of the Tao mansion screaming bloody murder.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

In the forest near Hao

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: "Okay, this may not be the most dangerous mission yet, but it's certainly the scariest…wait, no, I think Anna's room was scarier…anyway, this is still pretty scary.

Hao: "Sheeze! I am so happy I got away from those fan girls! Luckily, no one will find me here!"

Sho: Snicker

Hao: "I'm telling ya Fire Spirit, those girls are nuts! A few of them even wanted my underwear!

Fire Spirit/Sho: Disgusted face

Sho: "That's gross!"

Hao: "Huh!?! Who's there! OH NO! THE FAN GIRLS! THEY'VE FOUND ME! PLEASE! I JUST GOT NEW UNDERWEAR! DON'T STEAL THEM!

Sho: "HAHAHAHA!" Falls out of hiding, revealing himself to Hao.

Hao: Showing his angry face, which still looks very calm. "HOW DARE YOU FILM ME TALKING ABOUT THAT THING WITH THE FANGIRLS AND MY UNDERWEAR! JUST WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE FILMING ANYWAY!?!"

Sho: "Uuuh…making a documentary about Shamans"

Hao: Happy face "Oh! Well in that case, my right side's my best."

Sho: "Th-that's okay…I've gotten enough footage of you, so, I guess I'll be going now…" Breaks out into a run towards the Onsen with Hao close behind wanting to get filmed.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Smab: Thanks, I have fulfilled your request!

KendoSakuyamon: Thanks, and I have fulfilled your request too!

Gavrilla: Thanks! What does XD mean? I just read your fic, Shaman King Spin the Bottle Strip.

Katoryu Diethel: Don't worry, Lyserge is coming soon!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

REVIEW OR ELSE I WILL SIC MY EVIL MUTANT BUNNIES ON YOU!


	4. Chapter 4: Things get super strange

The Shaman Documentary Chapter 4

Sho: Holding the trigger that will release the evil mutant bunnies on Anna. "Muwahahahahahaha!"

Anna: "How dare you laugh at me! 2,000,000,000 PUSH UPS!"

Sho: O-O "D-don't you realize that I hold in my hand the trigger that will release the evil mutant bunnies on you!?!"

Anna: "Oh yeah? And just what will the bunnies do?"

Sho: "Uh…Y'know…evil…mutant…uh…bunny stuff."

Anna: - "JUST SHUT UP AND GIVE ME THE PUSH UPS ALL READY!!"

Sho: T-T runs away from Anna as fast as possible "AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

Anna: - "GET BACK HERE RYUNOSUKE!"

Faust's room

Sho: Creeps into Faust's room "Here we are at Faust, the insane necromancer/doctor's room."

Faust: Steps out of the darkness "Hello Mister Ryunosuke."

Sho: "Hiya creepy dude"

Faust: "Sigh." An Evil grin appears on his face "Hey Sho"

Sho: "Yeah Psyco?"

Faust: "You don't look so good."

Sho: "I don't? Is it the hair?"

Faust: "Sigh. No, I mean you look sick"

Sho: "I-I do?"

Faust: "Yes, you do. I think I'll have to operate!" Whips out a pair of sharp looking scissors.

Sho: "Uh…that's ok, I'll take my chances with my normal doctor."

Faust: "No! I insist! Stay…I'll give you a free operation."

Sho: "Uh…uh…no thanks." Runs out the door screaming.

Faust: "Hey! I was gonna use laughing gas!"

Tamao's room

Sho: "Okay, here we are in front of Tamao's room, the girl who has a crush on Yoh."

Tamao: "ZzzZzzZzz"

Sho: "Hmm…It seems she's asleep" Creeps over and looks at the wall/Yoh shrine. "Huh!?! What's this?" Sees a pic of HoroHoro and moves it, reveiling a button. "Hmm…I wonder what happens if I push this?" Pushes the button and the wall flips over to reveil a HoroHoro shrine. "This is gold! Gold!"

Tamao: "Huh? Huh? Hey! Sho! Get the heck out of my room!" Throws a metal shoe at shoe

Sho: "Ow!" runs away fast.

Tamao: "Oh no! Did I just see a camera in his hands?"

Lyserg's room

Sho: "Here we are at Lyserg's room, the girlish boy who has sworn eternal revenge on Hao"

Lyserg: On the phone "Yes Dr. Faust, the sex change has been working out fine, only one person ever suspected that I was a girl once."

Sho: "The mystery has been unraveled!"

Lyserg: "I almost wore a dress yesterday though."

Sho: "Yeah, and you still wore pink!"

Lyserg: "Huh? Wh-who's there? Are you Hao!?! I knew I should've protected my room with Hao-repellent!"

Sho: "Uh…no…just me!"

Lyserg: "Sho!? That's worse!"

Sho: "Uh…gotta go!" Runs away

Jeanne's room

Sho: "Here we are at 'Iron Maiden' Jeanne's room, she is a young priestess who, I believe has a hidden shrine to Lyserg or something."

Jeanne: Praying at her bed

Sho: Walks right by her and looks around her room. "Hm…nothing too strange for a priestess."

Pushes a small button in a cross, reveiling a small pic of Lyserg. "That's it? I did all that and that's it!?! A tiny pic! I'm leaving!" Walks out of the room in a pout

Jeanne: "Finally! He's gone!" Lifts up mattress and looks at millions of pics of Lyserg"

????: Knocks on the door.

Jeanne: Opens door

Sho: "Uh…I forgot my camera." Walks over and gets it, he realizes it was still filming. He looks at what he just caught on film "Heh heh heh"

Jeanne: "Uh…Oh…"

Sho: Leaves the room

Anna: "Get back back here Ryunosuke!!!"

Sho: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

Anna: Ties him up "Now! Gimme those push-ups!"

Sho: "Mmmf, Mmmf!"

S91: Okay, I will

Realm Warrior41: If you look at the chapter in the manga where they recall how Bailong died, you'll see pics of a woman next to bailong with too children in front of them. I'm assuming that that's his wife. And I liked how I screamed bloody murder too!

Katoryu Diethel: Well, as you can see, there's nothing to be afraid of…right?

Hug Obsessed Amber-person: Thanks, I try

Chibi Blue Angel: Thanks, and they are creepy.

Rola Tao: Thanks, and don't worry, I won't

Queenstheif Draconess Herself: I did it! I did Faust! And Who's Mr. Macho Hat?

If you don't review, then I'll sic my Evil Mutant Geese with Mullets on you!


	5. Mini series! News with Sho: pointy hair ...

Mini-fic- News with Sho

The camera zooms in to a boy with brownish hair and blue eyes. He is wearing a blue suit with a red tie and is sitting at a desk.

Boy: "Hello, my name is Sho Ryunosuke, and, um… heh hem!"

Sho: "That's better! My name's not boy! It's Sho! Well, anyway… on to the news!" Takes out a piece of paper. " Okay! It seems that HoroHoro was badly injured in a bizarre, accident, when he snowboarded off the Tao mansion and landed on Ren's head. Let's go to Pirka who's there with her brother and the Ren. Hello Pirka!."

Pirka: "Hello Sho!"

Sho: " So Pirka, what exactly happened?":

Pirka: "Well Jordan…"

Sho: "Psst! Don't say my real name!"

Pirka: "Okay…Sho… It seems that when my moronic brother boarded off the mansion, he screamed. So Ren, wanting to film HoroHoro in pain, rushed outside, just as my brother hit his head. Long story short, Ren's pointy hair pierced Horo's stomach and poked his liver. Horo, what do you have to say about this?"

HoroHoro: "I have to go to the bathroom! The hair also poked my bladder, so they replaced it with a robotic one that won't stop leaking!"

Pirka: "Well! You heard here first Sho!"

Sho: "Intriguing story Pirka!" Is handed another piece of paper. "Oh! I almost forgot! I need help with my Shaman Documentary fic. You see, I don't know anything about anyone that appeared in the anime from after the first episode with Faust. But just because I watch the anime doesn't mean I like 4kids! In fact, I read the manga too and have a subscription to Shonen Jump! Well, tomorrow, we'll have more news like…"

Freaky anouncer dude: " MY NAME…IS…BOB!"

Bob: " That's better, well, what happened at the Elvis convention? What does the girl's bathroom have to do with Shaman King? And more tomorrow…er…well, when ever Sho feels like doing another news mini-fic."

Sho: "Well, to everyone who is tuning in, thank you for watching, and, GOODNIGHT! PS: Review or I'll sic my evil mutant muskrats with liver, onions, and ugly 80's hairdos!


	6. Chapter 5: Things get random

Shaman Documentary 6: part 2: Quest for the lens.

Sho: Hey guys! Sorry for not updating in a long time, ya know, I had to study for my Bar Mitzvah and stuff.

Anna: NO EXCUSES! 600,000,000,000,000 PUSH UPS! NOW!

Sho: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! (Sho runs away)

Anna: HEY! GET BACK HERE!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: (Whispering) "Okay, here we are at the shaman onsen in the afternoon, lets watch"

Anna: "Yoh! Give me 90 laps around the house"

Yoh: "Yes Anna!" Yoh is running through the living room and sees Sho "Hi Sho!"

Sho: "Shut up! I'm not here, remember!?"

Yoh: "Oh yeah. Never mind." Runs away as Anna enters the room. She stands at just the right angle for Sho to film up her skirt.

Anna: Looks down, sees Sho, and kicks the camera, breaking the lens "PERVERT!" She walks away.

Sho: "Sob Sob Sob! My lens! My beautiful lens! I've been through six chapters with this little piece of glass! I shall get flash and make a movie dedicated to the loss of my lens! But first, I have to get a new one" Runs outside to the lens store. "Hello, I'd like to by a lens."

Clerk: "Sorry, all of our lenses…"

Ren: "LEN!?" Getting ready for bloody murder

Sho: "No! Not Len, he said lens! See! It's spelled differently!" Points to where I spelled the word lense on this fic.

Ren: "Oh!" Kills a guy anyway and leaves.

Clerk: "Anyway…all of our lenses were stolen by the evil glass king."

Sho: "Oh no! I will defeat him!" So Sho flies up to the glass king's evil fortress, fights the evil king, gets the lenses back, and all bloody and bruised, flies back home with lenses. "Okay, now that that's over, I'll put these extra lenses in my lens collection." Opens up a closet and sees one hundred unbroken lenses. "Okay, back to filming"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sho: Well, that was a short chapter, sorry

Anna: You are so lazy, so you must be punished! One gazillion pushups!

Sho: Uh…I can't I have to thank the reviewers.

Anna: (Snicker Snicker)

Kyoyama Kita: I know, but I still do it

Amanda: Thanks!

Rays number girl: After you're done, could you burn my sister too?

s91: I will, thanks


	7. Chapter 6: Return to somewhat normalcy

Shaman Documentary Chapter 7: Part 2: I'm not dead yet! (Or: Raiding Silva's closet)

Anna: "SHO!"

Sho: "Crap…"

Anna: Jumps on Sho and starts hitting him with a board with a nail. "Why haven't you updated?"

Sho: "Uh…heh…w-what do you mean…heh…?"

Anna: "DON'T PLAY DUMB WITH ME! YOU HAVEN'T UPDATED IN A YEAR!"

Sho: "Um…I've been busy…"

Anna: "WITH WHAT?"

Sho: "Um…Rock…Concert…?"

Anna: -- "…what…?"

Sho: "Yeah…heh, heh…at the School of Rock…ya know, It's a real place ya know…"

Anna: "YEAH RIGHT!" Brings out a gigantic hammer and makes Sho dead.

(Author's Note: I really do go the School of Rock, it's a real place. Oh, and I apologize for the unneeded randomness in the last chapter. I'll try to make it less random, now…ON TO THE FIC!)

Sho: "Alright, here we are outside Silva's apartment around noon, so he's probably out with the crappy Native American souvenir stand thing. That only leaves one thing to do…RAID HIS CLOSET!" Digs through a ton of crap and pulls out a bunch of other crap. "Lets see…rings, headbands, sunglasses, Silva's stash of money…" Pockets some money and continues. "hats, gloves, cigarettes…wait, CIGARETTES?"

: "HALT!"

Sho: "Who goes there?"

: "I AM THE CEO OF 4KIDS! AND I DECREE THAT THERE SHALL BE NO CIGARETTES ON MY SHOWS!" The Cigs all of a sudden disappear "NOW I SHALL GO SMOKE WEED."

Sho: "Well, that explains a lot" Sho then goes back to raiding the closet until he hits something big. "Woah, I've hit the jackpot…SILVA'S SHAMAN OFFICIANT ID! I can use this to impersonate him and get all the perks of an officiant! Wait…what exactly are the perks…? Lets see…you get crappy apartments, have to sell crappy Native American swag, have to hang around annoying bird ghosts, wear stupid masks, and just be plain old annoying…No thanks! I'm annoying enough, thank you!"

Silva: Walks in to see Sho raiding his closet. "AHEM!"

Sho: Turns head slowly very fearfully. "Uh…I wasn't here." Runs out as fast as he could. But not before Silva hit him in the back with an arrowhead. "OW!"

Silva: "HA! Score one for crappy Native American swag! …wait…"

Sho: Sorry that was a crappy and short chapter.

Anna: You realize this means you have to raise the ratings due to the drug reference

Sho: Dang…

Anna: Don't worry, it's Teen rated now.

Sho: Oh yeah, Damn.

Anna: Oh, I forgot to kill you today

Sho: Yeah, you di…WHAT!

Jordan (My real name): And so Anna chased Sho around the world trying to kill him every step of the way. In closing, if you don't review, I'll give George Bush the button that will blow up the Earth. And trust me, no one, and I mean no one, wants that.

Sho: Time to thank people!

S91: As always, thanks

Kimbob: Yeah, I agree, the last chapter was crap

Ren F: Glad to see somebody liked the last chapter

Sashsa: HOLY CRAP! I FORGOT TO DO YOH'S ROOM!

Rena: Thanks, I will.


End file.
